The Cheezy Chronicles: My Loves

A few days ago I was pondering about love (as I often do). I considered how blessed I am to have people I love and who love me back.

Most people yearn for a soul mate. Generally this is defined as an adult partner to walk through life with. We call them the Loves Of Our Lives, our One and Only. There is a mystical, magical feeling associated with this. It's a comfort and exciting to envision that union.

I'm not sure I will ever again find that ecstatic union of feeling like I'm with a "soul mate," in the way described above. I may/I may not find that partner to walk hand in hand with.

But I do know I've been beyond Blessed with my Ones and Onlies. I have three of them. They are my three daughters.

I adore them. They are my life. I would give my life in a nanosecond for them and am fierce in that love for them. Each is entirely different than the other. Each touches me in ways that make me cry. I am Blessed.

I've heard it said that little girls dream of their future marriage: what the dress will be like, who it will be,where, etc. I don't remember ever doing that. My day dreams when I was younger were about kids.
I used to fantasize that I ran an orphanage. It was in a castle in Scotland by the beach. We used to run on the beach, a line of kids and I, with scarves, dancing on the sand. I remember daydreaming about this in Jr. High. I don't remember there ever being a man in this scenario. It was just me and them.

Do the things we daydream about as a child find their ways into our lives? Are they hints of who we are at our core? Haven't a clue. But I've been remembering those daydreams these past few weeks, finding it interesting that when I think of my everlasting loves, it isn't one man that pops into my mind. It's my gals.

They are all around me now that it's the Christmas season. Tussles and sibling struggles of years past, appear to be gone now that theya re older. This year is a first for our family in that department.

Words cannot convey the immense joy I felt yesterday morning with my apron on, making brunch...with the three of them in the living room all working on a Christams puzzle I got, each cursing me becuase they couldn't pull themselves away from finding "just one more piece..."

I can think of no greater gift than a family. I am beyond Blessed.

image from here

The Cheezy Chronicles Begin

Life's been good.

After a couple of years of confusion, these past two months or so I'm feelin' increasing sparklies in my body, mind and spirit. I definitely feel I'm on my way back to the hum that was my life.

Part of these past two week's happies are that I'm really feeling the Christmas Spirit this year. My house is decorated, I've gotten the bulk of the gifts I'll be giving this year and I keep listening to my favorite Seasonal CD's. It's not unusual for me to break out in a carol or four while walking. I'm feelin' really really good.

In all this mix, I haven't felt like I've had much to share on here. I guess the tone of this blog has been primarily about my Spirit Journey, which is often me trying to figure things out..which means that I'm often lost and experiencing one form or another of internal drama. Since very little of that is going on, I haven't felt like writing here.

But I got a flash this morning, while doing my NIA time, that I'm so happy and grateful about life right now that I want to do a gratitude/appreciation series that flashed in as wanting to be called "The Cheezy Chronicles." I used to be focused on the little wonders that surround me, running around, talking about how Blessed I was and how I LOVED my life. I want to honor it all here.

So, to begin, I want to give huge thanks for feeling more "myself" (or the joyous/in tune self part, anyway). I am blown away by the gift of healing and potential I feel right now. I give thanks that I don't have to know where this will all end up. I'm so happy I listened to the little voice to do my month of breathing (which continues sporadically), and for having gone to the EFT session (which I continue to study and do a little bit of most every day).

I love the way my body feels when I'm truly happy and joyous. There's a hum of energy to it. I can feel life moving through me and I'm loving the return of that. When I tune in, it kinda feels like that buzz after a number of really nice orgasms and I envision that I am making love with Life. I am Blessed.

I am thankful for the learnings that continue here. Differeent levels of understandings and openings seem neverending. One realization opens to five more as I continue this journey. Last week, ancient issues around my mother were triggered via exchanges with two email buddies. I feel so blessed that they are coming to light now/again...to be held and cuddled and embraced a different way.

So....for the next few, however long, writings will be about the various things I feel beyond grateful for in this life. I have decided to allow GooberVoice to run wild and take center stage.

Life is grand. Indeed!!

Art from here